EP026 // An Inconvenient Truth // They Grow Up. Its What They Do.

Hello! and Welcome back to Season 2 of Peace by Pieces - Motherhood Edition

Whew!  I get emotional on this one because it IS emotional! 
We get told "They grow up so fast" and "You'll blink and they'll be driving"
And we get told "enjoy every minute"
And we get told "you'll miss this one day"
We're told "the days are long, but the years are short"

And they're right.
And by the time we truly understand these concepts for ourselves, they are already grown and we're telling the next generation of moms the same thing.

How to be HERE.  Right NOW. 

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I love you! I love your kids!  

Transcript

0:00

And this one this episode of piece by pieces. mother had Edition thought this one might start up some emotions in you and and I want you to perhaps shift your perspective on that if you're like, nope, that is not something I want to do. I am not I'm not down for that today. Maybe set a time. When you will be. Because it's important. All right, our emotions are messengers. They are messengers that bring you a message that like something needs your attention. Something important something important then he needs your attention. So with that let's go. This is this is factual. Mom mom. They grow up. They grow up. They grow up. I'm getting emotional. They grow up. It's what they do. when Rosie was little You know it always feels like when you when you have a baby every time you see, you know, a family member again, or or a friend or a co-worker or whatever and they you know, it's been weeks since they've seen the child or months even and they're like, oh my gosh, she's so big whenever someone would say that to me. I was like, yeah, they grow up. It's what they do. Like, she's literally growing every single day. So every single day she's a little bit bigger every single day. She's a little bit taller or longer or heavier or whatever right or more developed. She has more cells in her body. Like he's literally growing and they do. They grow up mama. It's what they do and we miss it. We miss it. And we will miss it. We will miss them being young girl. And we miss it not because we're working or cooking or cleaning. The those things factually do reduce the amount of moments that we spend with them. Directly with them, of course. And that's not good bad. Right or wrong. It just is it just is you know work has to be done and cooking has to be done and clean and has to be done and it's all part of the slice. There's zero judgment here, but no we we don't miss it because of those things. We miss it because they're right here right now and we are often not here right now. We are often wishing that they were older and more capable. When will they sleep through the night? Gosh, I'll be so happy when the when when she's out of the diapers or when are you gonna be able to go to the bathroom by yourself? You're big enough to put your jammies on alone. You're big enough to go find your shoes. Go find your shoes. and at the same time we missed them being smaller. missing that feeling of holding a baby or one day noticing that they have a scrape on their knee that they did not run to you to ask for a kiss on the booty for and now you're the one asking for hugs instead of being touched out and tired of being a chair like I was almost a piece of furniture for for a few years there. She was always on top of I'm crying by the way. So emotional along here with you Mama. Oh, we stand there in most moments comparing. What is to what was? in missing what was and or we stand there and most moments comparing what we want to have where we wish they were and what we want them to be or do. To where they are right now. and neither of those cases Are where we are here neither of those cases are here with them. right now and that's how we miss it. That's how we miss it. We may be physically present, but our mind is making grocery lists and to do list and inventing conversations and rehashing old arguments. We may be physically present, but emotionally we're in regret and shame and resentment and sadness or anger. and when we're in that Here we are disconnected from the now we are disconnected from them. Because they live in the now especially up until age five up until age seven. They are 100% fully in this moment right now. right now And when we're not we're disconnected from them, we're disconnected from love or disconnected from Joy. We're disconnected from peace or disconnected disconnected from the present moment. Now let me emphasize that this feeling of missing it the classic ya blink in their grown. It doesn't matter if you work or stay at home with them. It doesn't matter if you send them to school or you homeschool them. It doesn't matter if you are happily married to their father or you have shared custody and go days without them. It's about being fully present with them in this now moment where you are where they are now in any given moment. In any given now moment that you have being fully physically mentally emotionally spiritually present with yourself and with them for however many moments that you have available to you with them. Well some of you. Listening may have chosen to be with them 24/7 like me. But I know that that's uncommon and that's okay and you make the best decisions for you. and some of you May wish that you could be with them 24/7 but just can't imagine how that could be possible for you. And I think that that's more common and that's okay too and you make the best decisions for you. and maybe it is possible for you to be with them more but you just can't see how and I get that. I do and I and I have come to believe that we we usually have more options than we can see or imagine. And some of you went back to work because you want to and that's normal too. And that's totally okay and you make the best decisions for you. And some of you went back to work because you felt like you had to and I get it. I am a single mom and I don't get any child support I get that believe me. I don't I don't work outside of the home, but I do work you work and and you make both decisions. For you and your family. And you get to decide. That no matter the number of minutes that you get to have with your children. That you can be fully. there not wishing that they were smaller not wishing that they were more capable not wishing that they are different than they are. Not wishing that you were different than you are not wishing that circumstances were different not wishing that the grocery shopping would shop itself or the dinners or the laundry or whatever would take care of itself not wishing that you had the proverbial Village not wishing for anything other than to be fully present in the exact moments witnessing observing and participating in the miracle that you are living. You are a human adult woman that ushered life. into this world you created another human being inside of you. And you gave birth to them and they are growing up in front of your face. These beautiful amazing young humans that are growing and developing right before your eyes and the Wonder its breath and variation to this Human Experience. It's like a spectrum like the rainbow some moments are red. Some moments are yellow. Some moments are light green and some are dark blue and purple and pink in the whole shebang right and they are all beautiful and miraculous opportunities for love and compassion and joy and empowerment. and blessing I love you mama, and I love your kiddos and I love your future grandchildren if your children choose to to do that. and all of your future Generations this is where we change things. This is where our impact. will last for Generations and if this is what you wish your mind was full of and set of the stuff that it's full of now. Easily without years of therapy or tons of free time. Or time travel or hours of meditation or yoga or whatever. And without the support of the often missing Village that we all. Talked about a lot anyway. And if you're willing to entertain the idea that this could be possible for you. What if what if Mom? What if there was something? That could make this happen for you. No matter what. Your circumstances are no matter where you've come from no matter what you're living in right now. What in other and the other massive shifts that are possible? In just 20 minutes a day or while you sleep. And I have a thing for that. I have a multiple things for that actually. But it all starts with an application to the Joy is Mom accelerator, which is my Flagship program. But with the application it's really just to get to know you a little bit and to understand what your struggling with and what you would rather have in your motherhood experience and in your child's childhood. And with that application you're you're basically you're applying for a free one-to-one DM conversation with me. in Instagram Where with me or my team to get to understand where you are in your mom journey and how you'd like it to be? I have many options for from minimal Financial in time and energy investment to more robust programs. There is something that will work for you that will help you that will shift your mind that will. Bring you more Joey and happiness and presence for you and for your child and know it. So click that link below to apply for a chat and and I'm always running special offers as well. So with that I really hope to hear from you. I love you. I get excited to to know you and to get to know you and to teach you the tools to be the mom that I know that you can be that you know that you can be the mom that's in there. you know her she just may be a little Out Of Reach. But let's find her. Let's reconnect you with her. So that you can be calm in the chaos confident in the crazy consistent in the connection joyous and the juggle peaceful in the present. With infinite love and gratitude mama. apply below and I'll see you next episode.